question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
