just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
He passed out mid-signature
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
