When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
