You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
