Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
