Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize