Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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