dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
