We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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