If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
