It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
