I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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