i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize