Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I think I died a long time ago.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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