Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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