He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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