what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
