god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
