So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
