I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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