brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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