Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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