I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
