Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
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