i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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