Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
