i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
