I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
