even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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