she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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