Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
