Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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