just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
