she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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