Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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