And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
be right there i have to get my cape
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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