i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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