Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
