Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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