covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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