GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
