just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize