I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
