Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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