Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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