she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
