So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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