brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
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