O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
