Sry I called you an 8
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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