The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
