Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
