so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
